Random Thoughts of a Retiree

If you’re healthy and financially stable Retirement can be a wonderful time.

I originally thought retirement was going to be like the movie “Fiddler on the Roof” where I would sit around contemplating life, singing about Tradition and dreaming about being a Rich Man but that has not been the case.

When I first retired, my wife Kim didn’t say I was retired—she said I just didn’t have a job.

I told her I now work for "Kim Industries." The boss is tough, there's no chance for promotion, and there’s definitely no time off.

I didn’t realize until retirement that paper towels are apparently off-limits, and my "Honey Do" list has turned into a "Honey Do or Else" list.

My wife gets annoyed when she works a double shift, and I call it my vacation.

She also doesn’t seem to believe in physics because she can't understand why I can't be in two places at once.

I keep trying to convince her that there are no deadlines in retirement, but she’s not buying it.

Since retiring, I’ve noticed how little of the day is left after all the complaining. And yes, napping is a perfectly legitimate retirement activity.

Though I lost 50 lbs and I have maintained this weight loss for almost 2 years my wife continues to say my portions are much bigger than they should be. Each week when I weigh myself if I lose weight or maintain the same weight I tell her that I wasn’t “Portion Compromised” for the week. If you are interested in my journey click the following link - My Story

People often think retirement means you have endless free time, but that’s not true.

Retirement is a great chance to enjoy what you’ve accomplished and watch your children grow into adults you're proud of.

The best part of Retirement ? No meetings, project deadlines, or unrealistic demands, and the freedom to do whatever you want.

When my wife retires we are going to get 2 Stair Lifts, install them on the left and right side of the staircase then race them all day.

Since retiring my wife says I am a riot but riots have to be stopped !!

My wife says I am nosy at least that is what she writes in her diary

Sex over 60 is ok but if you really need it that bad you should pull off the road

After months of retirement, I can’t stop thinking about the song “The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia.” The lyrics say, "That's the night the lights went out in Georgia" - "That’s the night they hung an innocent man." If a prisoner is hung, the lights won’t go out; if electrocuted, they would. How has no one noticed this?

You are not a failure unless you fail then give up. Ulysses S. Grant failed at almost everything he did until he joined the army, moved up the ranks to become a general, defeated the confederacy thus saving the union, let the confederate soldiers return home then was elected president.

You learn more from failing then you do from succeeding so failing is not necessarily a bad thing but rather it can be a great learning experience.

I told my wife Kim that I now work for "Kim Industries." The boss is tough, there's no chance for promotion, there’s definitely no time off but I wouldn't trade this job for anything in the world - Love you Honey !!

Looking back at things that I miss:

Brigham’s, Friendly's ( Raspberry Ricky's and Lime Ricky's were the best ), The Barn Deli, Pewter Pot ( Hot Blueberry Muffins with Ice Cream on Top ) , Hilltop Steakhouse and Earl of Sandwich ( The best Cheese Steaks )
Radio Shack ( They had any gadget you could ever want )
Drive-ins ( 10 years old in 1968 saw Planet of the Apes at the Saugus Drive-In which became a Showcase cinema and is now an Amazon warehouse )
4th of July Block Parties
Free concerts in Boston at the Hatch Shell and Government Center - ( Blood, Sweat and Tears, Dion, Little Richard, The 4 Tops, The Everly Brothers, War with Eric Burdon, Johnny Rivers, The Chi-lites, The Stylistics, The Monkees, Paul Revere and the Raiders etc.)
All Day Blues Concerts at Great Woods now the Xfinity Center Mansfield MA ( Stevie Ray Vaughn, Wet Willy, Koo Koo Taylor - Wang Dang Doodle, Buddy Guy etc. )
This Week in Baseball TV Show
World Series games played during the week days and week-ends - I remember watching after school the 1969 World Series when the Mets beat the Orioles
TV shows - Rat Patrol, Green Hornet, Man from Uncle, The Wild Wild West, Time Tunnel, Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea, Kung Fu, Mission Impossible and of course Combat
Johnny Quest, the Herculoids and Space Ghost Cartoons
The Midnight Special TV Show
In Concert TV Show ( Got to see some great 70s bands for the first time - Bowie, Steely Dan, Alice Cooper, Allman Brothers, Doobie Brothers etc.)
The original Twilight Zone series ( The stories were and still are the scariest ever made - Rod Serling was a genius )
The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson - He was and will always be the best - I don't know anyone that watches late night talk shows anymore - I did also like Craig Ferguson because he was a naturally funny down to earth person
Marching in Drum Corps (IC Reveries - 1969 - 1973) - It was a great time and I met a lot of wonderful people - We practiced at the Everett MA Armory and I was acting like a punk during one practice. At the break a few of the guys in the corps kicked my butt. I decided I was going to quit so for the second half of the practice I waited out in front of the building. As I was always with the corps I never heard how the corps as a whole sounded and it was fantastic. I went back and apologized the next practice and never acted like a punk again.
The World Open at Manning Bowl in Lynn MA - Saw Corps from all over the country and some from Canada
Happy Hours ( When one person who didn't drink did the driving )
When the New England Patriots could pick up first downs
Watching Bobby Orr
Pleasure Island Wakefield MA ( Disney of the Northeast 1959 - 1969 ) - ( The 50 feet whale Moby is still there ) - Click this link for his current status - Moby Dick
If interested Facebook also has the group "Ghosts of Pleasure Island Wakefield, Massachusetts" and the moderator does walking tours from time to time
As indicated below the sign for Pleasure Island can still be seen on Route 128 though the water that Moby has been residing in for the last 55 years now belongs to the Edgewater Business Park

Click the following link to see my personal experience with Moby Dick at Pleasure Island -

Looking back at things that I don't miss:

Driving to work on Route 128 - I did this for 30 years and it was usually at least an hour to get to work and on a bad day 1 1/2 hours. This was even when the company that I worked for could be seen from Route 128 or in another case the company that I worked for was a short distance from the Burlington Mall. I feel bad for anyone that has to do this each day.
The boredom before cell phones when waiting at doctors’ offices or when waiting for someone
Only having one chance to reach someone before answering machines came along
Needing to go to the library to settle an argument
Vinyl sounding terrible after the album was played so much
Using paper maps for road trips
Having to walk to school no matter the weather
Do you remember these ? After a while they starting shattering and were banned
Only 3 TV Stations
Being only able to watch movies like the Wizard of Oz once a year
Job Interviews ( At one interview I guess because my name is Richard the interviewer asked if he could call me "Dick" and I said No - Didn't get that job ) ( I went on another job interview during an incredibly hot August day and just as the interview started a fire alarm went off - I had to join everyone in the company on the roof of the company across the street then after 20 minutes we went back to continue the interview but I was so drenched from sweating I looked like I had just jumped in a pool - Didn't get that job )
No one can forget the Blizzard of 78 - Everything was shut down in MA as there was a driving ban on. I worked for a store that had a flat roof and they were worried that their roof might collapse so myself and friends walked down to the store, shoveled off the snow and got paid in cash at the end of the day, On the trip down it looked like an Apocalypse movie as there were no cars on the Lynn Way. My friend Tony thought it was funny that I stepped in dog poop on the walk to the store and unfortunately for me I stepped in dog poop on the walk back from the store. I also shoveled for the rest of the week with another friend and once again got paid at the end of each day. So what the Blizzard meant for me at 20 years old was shoveling during the day and drinking at the bar at night.